“Sorry Nat, I was feeding some geese”

First I was delayed by the person I was meant to pick up from, because her phone line was busy, so I went for a poo in the disabled toilets. Once that was dealt with, I rang again and picked up from her, and then when I left the building I was delayed by a very polite security guard who asked me to walk until I was off the premises, which was a bit annoying because he was such a nice geezer that I couldn’t just ignore him. Then I got hungry, and you wouldn’t expect a van driver to carry on up the motorway on his fuel reserves, so the same rule should apply to me and all, so I started eating a sandwhich. I was next to the canal at the time, and Canada geese flocked around me. I thought, geese are cool, so I ate only the filling of the sandwhich, and allowed the geese to pick bits of the bread from my hands. Which was nice.